Light & Shadow
by YaoiRomantic
Summary: Kakashi is always hidden in the haunting shadows of his life, never to be comfort andnever to be happy. Even after a meeting with a chunnin he begins to care for, it seems he is to live life alone.


Light & Shadow

He walked into the lonely apartment once more, his shadow the only thing to greet him as the outside light desperately tried to cover the floor until the door shut out all light completely. He could feel his heart drop as there was no warm, loving touch to brush against his skin but only a cold shadow to hide him away from everything. Kakashi's life was very much like his apartment: cold, hidden away from the world and always alone.

The ninja slowly made his way to his bedroom, looking around at his surroundings but still nothing to comfort him and his weary heart. He pushed the door in front of him and as it slowly opened, he hoped that there would be standing anyone to just welcome him home but as usual, there was nothing but a chill and the darkness of the night.

His unmade bed, the only comforting thing to him was the only thing Kakashi look forward too at the end of almost everyday. His tired body collapsed on top of his cold sheets and began to crawl into the bed. His covers where again cold and harsh, but this is what comfort was to Kakashi. He ran his fingers over his scarred cheek, which ran up over his left eye, a memory that would never fade. He could feel invisible tears crying from his soul as he wrapped his arms around himself, knowing that the only person who loved him was himself.

Morning broke through the window onto the empty bed as Kakashi closed the door to his apartment once again, heading down the street in boredom. No one to meet up with, no one for company, just himself again until his team returned from a simple mission.

"Excuse me…" a voice yelled as Kakashi walked down the street, his face masked from the world again. He turned to see beautiful tea like skin, coffee shaded hair; chocolaty eyes that looked back at him, even the horizontal scar that crossed his nose was beautiful in its own way.

"Can I help you?" Kakashi asked as a smile crossed his face, a true smile that hadn't shown for ages. He looked down to see the Chuunins standing just at the tip of his shadow, almost hesitating to step into it. He could feel his smile starting to fake just like his other smiles he had put on to the world to hid his pain.

The Chuunin walked closer, the shadow consuming him from his legs up until he was completely sheltered by it. Kakashi looked to see the Chuunin's face only a few inches away from his own; a sudden warmth coming from within him brought back his true smile looking at the Chuunin. He restrained himself from grabbing the tanned man and embracing him tightly, holding him closely and never wanting to let go of him.

"Kakashi-Sama?" he asked with a smile that lit up Kakashi's exposed eye.

"Yes?"

"I was wondering if you could tell me about team sevens progress?" he asked excitedly.

Kakashi felt a little disappointed that he had asked about his team rather than himself but that was expected as they had never met before.

"Forgive my rudeness but may I ask who you are?" Kakashi asked not wanting to scare the Chuunin off.

"Forgive me Kakashi Sama; I am Umuino Iruka, Naruto's previous sensei at the academy". His cheeks turned a slight pink as he tittered with embarrassment.

"Iruka…." Kakashi loving whispered to himself; his mind beginning to daydream.

"Tell you what, I will tell you about team seven and Naruto's progress if you agree to have lunch with me over the next 2 hours" Kakashi bargained as he snapped out of his daydream.

"It's a deal!" Iruka laughed as he moved out of Kakashi's shadow and next to him and headed down the empty road. "How about Ichiraku's place for lunch?" Iruka asked as both of them followed their shadows down the street towards the small Raman bar at the corner where Iruka and Naruto usually ate.

"I'll have shio" Kakashi ordered as Iruka ordered some shouyu, both men sat on the stools and waited for their orders. A look of infatuation covered Kakashi's face as he stared at the Chuunin in a haze.

The hours passed in a flash as they discussed Naruto and his team mates, but the managed to get of the topic and start to talk about themselves and life and general. Although it was no big deal for Iruka, Kakashi was enjoying every second of his company as he never got to talk this much.

"How did you get that?" Kakashi asked looking to the Chuunins nose.

"Get what?" Iruka asked as he took another mouth full of Raman from his third bowl.

Kakashi leaned forward and gently caressed the scar across Iruka's face. The Jounin blushed to himself as his fingers ran across warm skin which he hadn't felt for ages; it was comforting.

Iruka blushed as he looked down to the ground, embarrassed at Kakashi's touch. "I'll tell you but only if you tell me how you got that?" Iruka giggled.

"Got what?" Kakashi asked as he pulled his hand away from Iruka's face.

Iruka slowly moved Kakashi's silver hair from covering his left eye and rested his thumb above his eyebrow. Tracing the scar down, Iruka's thumb gently ran across Kakashi's eye which made Kakashi jolt slightly at the touch. His mind ran wild with thought of Iruka, how could a Chuunin he had just met make him feel like he had never felt before.

"IRUKA SENSEI!" A loud yell came from outside Ichiraku. Kakashi looked over too see Naruto standing there. A sudden rage burst inside of him, Kakashi could kill Naruto without thinking twice right now for he had ruined their deep bliss of each others company. Kakashi looked over to small blonde boy, trying to hold himself back before attacking him.

"Kakashi sensei? Why are you here with Iruka?" Naruto asked him very rudely, implying that he shouldn't be near Iruka.

"Iruka and I were just having lunch and talking before a certain Gennin came in and rudely interrupted us!" Kakashi said with aggression in his voice, his hand gripping onto his knee with anger running through his veins.

"Our mission was a success, I was great and Sasuke got into trouble and…." Naruto began to ramble as Iruka smiled and nodded. Kakashi's eyes moved from the Gennin back to Iruka, hoping the conversation would end and Kakashi and Iruka could continue their conversation. "….and Sakura would have totally feel for me if Sasuke never ruined it!" Naruto finished, gasping for air.

Kakashi frowned thinking about Naruto's words; '_Sakura would have totally feel for me if Sasuke never ruined it! Well I would have had Iruka if Naruto never ruined it for me!' _Kakashi thought to himself, getting slightly upset about it.

"That's life for you Naruto, not everyone can be happy and you will see that most of us will never be happy" Kakashi calmly said as he got up and headed outside, leaving Iruka behind and allowing him to spend time with Naruto.

"What's his problem? Anyway Iruka, we have to celebrate my mission so how about some Raman?" Naruto yelled in excitement as he jumped onto the stool next to Iruka.

The day seemed of just gotten more miserable as Kakashi wandered the streets, everyone around him laughing and enjoying each others company where he just slunk past with his hands in his pockets. He watched his shadow on the ground as he felt his heart yearning for Iruka again.

"I guess it's just not meant to be" he whispered to himself as he put on his fake smile, trying to cheer up but just getting more upset.

Kakashi's fellow Jounins where always together, their companionship lasting forever and their friendship never ending. A friend. Hmm. Kakashi had his team-mates, had his admirers and idols; but no friend. Maybe he was just too live life alone as a ninja, strong and not having the weakness of friendship to hold him back from his full potential. But Kakashi didn't need power; he needed a companion to share his power with. His eyes began to sting as he held back tears of sorrow; his life was just not worth living. A horrible childhood where he lost his family and only friends and his adult hood without a pal. The only thing that spent most of it's time with Kakashi was his shadow, at least he could count on that to always be with him.

"Kakashi sensei!" Iruka yelled as he ran up the road, following Kakashi's trail.

Kakashi turned slowly to see the Chuunin running up to him again, but this time he seemed more eager to see him this time round. "Hey!"

Kakashi's heart lifted once again as Iruka caught up to the older man, his cheeks slightly flushed.

"Where is Naruto?" Kakashi asked, expecting to see him appear along with Iruka.

"I told him that I would see him later; that I was spending the afternoon with you!" Iruka blushed slightly as he told his new friend.

Kakashi blushed slightly at the gesture and looked to Iruka, his hands still in his pocket.

"I'm sorry Iruka kun but…" Kakashi swallowed hard. "…I'm kind of busy just now but we can met up some other time ok?" and with that said he vanished in a puff of smoke, leaving Iruka standing there a bit confused. The Chuunin smiled to himself, feeling a bit disappointed about being abandoned by Kakashi.

"I guess that I will just do some reports then" Iruka whispered to himself as he turned and slowly made a lonesome trip to the office to help out.

Kakashi sat in the tree's that overlooked the rippling orange and pink lake as the sun slowly sunk into it. He had regretted what he done to Iruka this afternoon but he knew it was for the best. He would not set himself up for disappointment again and decided to keep his distance from the Chuunin. He looked down to see a ripple growing in the lake due to his tears; his soul could not bare the thought of being alone again. He was destined to live a famous and glorious life, but never to be truly happy. The Jounin watched the sunset as the darkness once again grew; joining with his shadow until he was again hidden in the darkness which he hade come to known and dread. Once again, it was time for him to go back to his dark, cold apartment and return to his bed which again was the only thing comforting to Kakashi.

The Jounin slowly opened the door, ready to greet his shadow upon the floor but as the door opened his shadow vanished as the hallway glowed. He looked around to see that his hallway was lit up, and for some strange reason it smelt clean. He moved over to his living area and noticed that the place was lit up by all the candles he had never used before. His bathroom smelling of lavender warm water filled his tub. He touched the water to feel the warmth against his skin, such warmth was somewhat comforting. He usually only got to take quick showers in between missions but he hadn't taken a bath for many months. Surely he must have had the wrong apartment, maybe he had been evicted or maybe he was dreaming. Every room was light up with a warm light that he hadn't seen for ages. The apartment had never been this bright before but as he moved into his dining room, he noticed that it was completely dark apart from a single candle in the middle of the table. Next to it sat two places set for supper, cutlery and crockery set up with two glasses next to them. Someone had or was in the apartment and Kakashi had never had company over before. He moved around to the kitchen slowly, ready for anything to happen in this unusual situation.

Kakashi peered into the kitchen to smell something cooking, nothing like he had smelt before next to the counter he see someone making their way over to him, knife in hand.

"Not so fast!" Kakashi yelled as he pounced on his attack, disarming them and pinning them to the ground.

"Iruka sensei?"

Kakashi jumped off him, surprised to see the man he chased away here. His mind was over whelmed with all of this, his apartment alive with activity in it, a guest actually coming to greet Kakashi.

"Welcome home Kakashi Sama!" Iruka laughed as he rose to his feet again.

"Home?" Kakashi replied as his heart stopped. His apartment was no longer empty and all his feelings of loneliness vanished as he looked to Iruka. His eyes noticed the reports on kitchen counter.

"Before you come to the conclusion that I only came here to deliver your report, you're wrong. On my way to the office I asked a few people for your address because I wanted to make sure you where ok and when I got here, your door was unlocked. I came in to se that your apartment is a mess and forgive me for being forward but I had to tidy up, this place could depress anyone. I took your spare key, went to the office and after finishing, I got some stuff from the store came here and tidied up and thought we could maybe pick up where we left of this afternoon with a nice supper. This makes me ask these three questions:

1 – Why did you bail on me this afternoon?

2 – When was the last time you had company over?  
And 3 – Why don't you have one single piece of food here?

I bought you some food for the next few days and when I come back around here in the next few days I better see a clean apartment because you're cooking me lunch." Iruka lectured him, his inner teacher coming out.

Kakashi was stunned, his eyes filling up with tears of joy. Finally he wasn't alone, he always dreamt of coming home to a loving family and now he finally had.

"After supper, I will allow you to take your bath in peace, sleep in your bed which has actually been made and a change of sheets and I will pop back around in the morning to cook us some breakfast" Iruka told him as he turned to check on his cooking.

Strong arms wrapped around Iruka as he turned to see Kakashi embracing him tightly. Mask-less.

"Your mask!" Iruka stuttered as he stared at the mans beautiful sculpted face.

"Iruka, please chase away all my shadows. Please always be here when I come home to greet me and please always be with me no matter what!" Kakashi begged as his heart bleed out words he longed to speak. Iruka turned and took Kakashi by the hand.

The harmony of their skin together; like milk is to tea was peaceful as there fingers entwined with great intimacy as there eyes connected. Kakashi leaned forward gently; rubbing his nose on Iruka's making his scar tingle slightly.

"Will you spend the night Iruka?" Kakashi asked before sweetly pressing his lips against his new companion's lips.

Their lips pulled away slowly as their eyes locked, both men blushed as their hearts raced in perfect synchronisation with each others.

"I'd love too my dearest friend. And Kakashi"

"Yes my dearest companion?" Kakashi replied as his cheeks burnt brighter as he spoke the words he only dreamt of speaking.

"You don't have to worry anymore. I will chase away all of your shadows and I will always be your light" Iruka replied as he leaned forward once again to press his soft lips against his lovers as their shadows entwined together on the floor.


End file.
